The Background

A few years hence and not that far away, the parish priest of St. Ferdinand the Flatulent was having problems.

A local gang of toughs, led by the notorious Red Alex, had set up base in the parish and were using the location as a centre of operations for their nefarious activities. The parishioners tut-tutted when they saw his boys dealing, they complained to the cops about the influx of tarts and they generally made a nuisance of themselves with their protests.

The medlling do-gooders and assorted oldies that still attended the church annoyrd Alex. He decided to do something.

Fr. Boris coped with the graffiti, he coped with the abuse, he even coped when his Reliant Robin was stolen, but when his parishioners began to be threatened and mugged he called the Bishop for help.

Two weeks later, after the vicious murder of an elderly woman, Br. Lawrence Callahan of the obscureand secretive order of St. Bibiana the Unwashed arrived to help with parochial duties.

Br. Lawrence was not immediately popular with the remaining worshipers, or indeed, Fr. Boris. His order vehemently opposed the belief that 'Cleanliness is next to Godliness' and never washed. His habit was tattered and stained, his tonsure ragged and he smellled bad. The only thing remotely clean about him was the small leather case that he carried everywhere with him.

Opinions changed when Mrs. Thompson was on her way to Midnight Mass. She was challenged at the churchyard gates by a young thug with an Uzi. Screams and shouts ensued as the elderly church arrivals panicked. Fr. Boris left his preparations at the altar and went to door to find the source of the commotion when he heard a loud explosion and then utter silence. Br. Lawrence stood at the door with his small leather case unzipped on the floor beside him. In his hand the largest pistol any of the terrified onlookers had ever seen.

Br. Lawrence looked at the thug with blood streaming from the hand that had held the Uzi. "Do you feel lucky, punk?" the smelly monk demanded. The thug turned and ran.

Br. Lawrence, better known as Dirty Larry, the diocesan enforcer, had arrived to save the day.

Red Alex knew he would have to take immediate action when his wounded boy returned with a tale of a dirty psycho monk. If he were to retain his authority with his gang the monk would have to be made an example of.

The Action

The clash between Br. Lawrence and Red Alex's gang takes place in the early hours of the morning (NIGHT) in and around the churchyard of St. Ferdinand's and the surrounding slum streets.

One player takes the sole role of Br. Lawrence, a Hero with a heavy handgun, light armour (the layers of filth which make up his habit give a certain amount of resistance) and his eyes have been replaced with bionic version which give him night vision capability.

Special Rules

Br. Lawrence is not merely a hero but a 'superhero'. He is a superb shot and only misses if a '1' is thrown. No modifiers ever apply. He is only killed on a throw of '1' on his heroic save and only becomes suppressed if a 2 or 3 are thrown. He receives 3 Combat dice because opponents are reluctant to engage him due to his repulsive smell.

The other player commands Red Alex's gang. He may spend up to 200 points on a scavenger gang of at least 5 members, one of which must be up-graded to Leader.

Victory Conditions

Red Alex wins if Br. Lawrence is killed and he remains alive.

Br. Lawrence wins only if he is the last man standing, although extra points can be awarded for the issuing of appropriate quotes and Clint Eastwood impersonations.

Any other result is a draw.

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