Leave of Absence

Richard Grayson was just heading for the main tent when he felt a very slight tug on his left arm. Glancing around and seeing nothing, he continued on, but soon felt the pull again--even more insistent. "Raven?" he called, not aloud, but in his mind.

There was no answer save another tug.

The young detective decided to take a chance and follow the pull, with every sense alert. He'd barely taken a step to the left when Haly's Circus disappeared, and he found himself surrounded by inky blackness that was dotted with tiny pinpoints of light which he assumed were stars.

"What the hell?" His own voice startled him.

The strange pull, now more of a shove, propelled him forward. First through a dusky cemetery, then through a dark, run-down alley, and finally to the midst of rose-tinted clouds. At least he thought they were clouds, they looked more like pink cotton-candy and felt like extra plush carpet, he decided when he found he was also standing on the stuff.

"Oh, my! You're just perfect!" exclaimed a delighted female voice.

Dick spun in a complete circle, trying to focus on the source of the unfamiliar voice, which actually seemed to come from everywhere. "Who are you? Where the hell am I?"

"And they said not to bother trying," chuckled the voice. "Well, we'll certainly show them, won't we Mr...." the was a faint rustling of papers. "Mr. Grayson? Goodness, even the name is good. I won't have to change a thing."

"Who are you?"

"Believe me, I'm not half so important as you are. I'm just the writer. You, on the other hand, are the hero in my newest novel. You're perfect for the part, you know."

"A writer?" The Titan cast about desperately for some movement, something tangible that would give him an answer. "C'mon, where are you? Where am I?"

There was a somewhat pouting sigh, "Alright, I'll explain, even though you won't remember. You're in a limbo of sorts--now don't be like that, dear--" she said when she saw Dick tensing for an attack. "I'm not going to hurt you, nobody will ever know you're gone, and when this is all over, you won't remember a thing. So just play along and have a good time, alright?"

Seeing no immediate way out, the detective nodded, "Alright."

"Very good. Now, let's see, we won't have to change a single thing about your looks... um...you're name...Richard M. Grayson. What does the M stand for, dear?"

"Michael." Dick muttered, hoping that she wouldn't constantly be calling him "dear."

"Michael....Michael...no, we'll just stick to Richard. It's a good strong name. Of course, those clothes will have to go. I only write the historical type, you know."

"Historical type?" Dick echoed, his curiosity finally getting the better of him.

"Romance novels, dear! You know, damsels in distress, dashing knights and rogues! Haven't you ever seen them?"

"Well, yes...but..."

She didn't miss the note of disgust in his voice "Well, of course you never read them, you're obviously far too intelligent for that. I don't go around picking fools for characters--unless they're required, of course." The somewhat ditzy note in her voice disappeared momentarily, "Just between you and me, I can't stand the stuff. But a girl's got to pay the rent somehow. Right?"

"Right." Dick agreed reluctantly.

"Right! So back to you. A knight or a nobleman?"

Dick looked down to find that his jeans and sweatshirt had dissolved into a suit of armour, which in turn changed to a velvet doublet.

"You look good, but something just doesn't seem to work." She sighed dramatically, then suddenly giggled, "Oh, I think I've got it! Oh gracious, this is perfect! A pirate! You'll make a simply wonderful pirate!"

"A pirate!? I can't be a pirate!"

"Why not, dear?"

"They're criminals." Dick wondered briefly why he had begun participating in this insanity. "I'm a crimefighter."

"Alright, dear, we'll make you a good pirate."

"There's no such thing." The detective contradicted, amazed at himself for arguing the point.

"There is now," the tone left no room for argument, "And you're it. Now how does that--" A startled gasp, "Oh my! Well, I'll just have to get this down on paper right away!"

"Get what down?" Dick asked, looking at his newest change of clothes.

"A description of how you look, dear. Just wait a moment, will you?"

"Do I have a choice?"

Dick's sarcasm was wasted on this voice, who only answered absently: "No, dear, you don't." There were a few minutes of mumbling before a gleeful: "My word, I won't have to exaggerate about anything! Now...do you have a lady fr--you'll have to stop that, Richard, who ever heard of a blushing pirate?"

"I can't help it!" Dick snapped, "You sound like my grand-mother or something!"

"Grandmother?" the voice snorted, "You wouldn't say that if you knew what I was thinking! Oh, dear! I've done it again, haven't I?" she sighed when the young pirate's face flushed darker. "Why don't we change the subject, hmmmm? Do you have a girlfriend, dear?"

"Yes."

"And what is her name?"

"Kory." The name was out before he could consider the consequences of giving it.

"Kory? Let's see..." more papers rattled, "Well! A princess! Princess Koriand'r...aren't you a lucky young--good heavens!" the voice took on a horrified tone. "Oh my God!"

Dick felt his stomach twist uncomfortably,"What's wrong? Is Kory alright?"

"I don't know, dear, what did she look like before?" Before Dick could say anything, the voice continued on, "It doesn't matter, anyway, her temperament is all wrong. We'll just have to find you someone else. I'll be right back dear." In the few moments of relative silence that followed, Dick was positive he heard a computer printer working. "Here we are! Won't this be wonderful? Now close those baby blues, I want this to be a surprise."

"No."

"Oh, come now, dear," the voice coaxed. "You said you'd play along."

"I'm not closing my eyes," Dick said decidedly.

"Still not sure, are you? Alright, it'll be enough of a surprise as is. Now where is she? Oh, way over there, huh? Alright...c'mon Blondie..."

THE END

Back to The Tower